(pulls eyelid down at dunestar..."nyaah, i can do it too...but probably not as well...")

the echidna appears with the FoE in tow.

ech: "here is the site of our next mission..."

purity: "hey!"

ryle: "it's-"

ensemble: "the beach!"

they rush off and a large dust cloud forms. when it clears we see everyone but the echidna sitting on a blanket under a large umbrella. everyone has miraculously changed into bathing suits, and they all have books and sunglasses.

echidna: (yelling) "what the #@*%! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALL DOING?!?!"

ensemble (astonished): "huh?"

echidna: (rolling eyes heavenward) "we are not here to bake ourselves and eat ice cream. we are here to capture bruce, the legendary shark pokemon."

mechachu: "legendary..."

purity: "shark..."

sharkdog: "pokemon?"

(all stare in consternation, then push ryle forward.)

mechachu, purity and sharkdog: "you first!"

(ryle runs up the umbrella pole and clings to the top as the others shake it.)

echidna: (yelling) "KNOCK IT OFF!! NOW GET IN THE WATER AND GET THAT POKEMON!!"

(FoE stare at one another nervously.)

purity: "er, how do you know it's out there?"

(suddenly mulder and scully appear.)

mulder: "the shark is out there..."

scully: "mulder, how can you be sure? there could be any number of perfectly natural explanations for the phenomenon..."

(two furry muppets appear and sing, "do-do dee-do-do", then disappear.)

purity (interrupting) "what phenomenon?"

muppets: "do-do do-do!"

mechachu (looking around) "freaky!"

purity and scully together: "PHENOMENON!"

muppets: "do-do, dee do-do, dee-do-do, dee do-do-do-do-do-dee-do!" (they disappear)

scully: "well, look at these fbi photos."

(all look at a series of photos, showing boats and things with huge bites out of them.)

sharkdog: "bruce?"

(echidna nods sternly.)

FoE ensemble: "ehhhhhhh...."

mulder (interrupting) "what do you mean, 'bruce'? this is no legendary shark pokemon--no. this is just a small part in the goverment's conspiracy against its citizens...this shark is here to further the alien agenda."

echidna: (skeptically) "don't you think you're being a little bit paranoid?"

(space ghost and zorak suddenly appear.)

space ghost: "you'd be paranoid too if everyone was out to get you!" (mulder and space ghost shake hands.)

FoE ensemble: (singing, sotto voce)
"care-ful-ly on tip-toe stea-ling,
breathing gent-ly as we may,
ev'ry step with cau-tion fe-eling,
we-e wi-ill soft-ly sneak a-waaay..."

echidna: (yelling...again) "GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!!"

(the FoE sigh loudly, and stop.)

purity: "why do you want a legendary shark pokemon anyway?"

mulder: (interrupting) "it's not a legendary pokemon, it's--"

scully: (whacking him with the file.) "shut up, mulder. i'm sick of your alien conspiriacies and i want to see a pokemon battle."

echidna: "so get going already!"

(the FoE heads dejectedly towards the water. they huddle in a group at the water's edge, and dip their toes in. they then refuse to budge.)

echidna: (yelling, again) "WHAT NOW?"

ensemble: "THE WATER IS FREEZING!!"

echidna: (still yelling) "OF COURSE IT'S FREEZING!! THIS IS CANADA!!"

(scully blinks.)

scully: "canada? what the hell are we doing here? we film in los angeles now! let's get out of here!"

mulder: "what about the pokemon battle?"

(scully drags him away.)

echidna: "well?"

(FoE members look at one another, then seize sharkdog and toss him in the water. he flounders about wildly and swears at them. suddenly a large shark fin appears, cutting towards him.)

ryle: (yelling) "look out!"

purity: (yelling) "it's bruce, the legendary shark pokemon!"

echidna: (yelling...again) "capture it!"

sharkdog: (yelling) "you go to hell!"

mechachu: (yelling) "swim faster, man!"

(FoE members look at one another, then jump in the water to help sharkdog. all scream because of the cold, then release their pokemon, then try to stand on top of one another in an attempt to stay out of the water.)

ensemble: (yelling) "GO, ALL OF YOU! GET THAT SHARK!"

(all pokemon attack sharkdog)

sharkdog: "urk!"

ensemble: (yelling) "NO! THE OTHER SHARK!"

(echidna buries his face in his hands.)

(all the pokemon attack bruce, the lengendary shark pokemon, and knock it out. the FoE begins to argue over who gets to throw the ball to capture it, and the pile-up topples over, dropping all of them into the sea. sharkdog takes advantage of this and throws a pokeball.)

sharkdog: "pokeball go!" (bruce is captured.)

(FoE return in triumph and hand pokeball to the echidna.)

echidna: (laughs evilly) "wait'll the heroic force finds this in their swimming pool...now i need to go get some throat lozenges."

er, i guess that's the end. i'm all out of ideas.

zorak: "pfft. i didn't even get any lines."

FoE catches the Shark Pokémon, but it's not what they expected.

Purity: Well, we finally caught the shark Pokémon, Echidna, happy, now?

Echidna: Not so fast, I must...investigate..your findings..

Purity [giving evil stare]: That's all you better be investigating, Echidna!

Echidna opens Pokéball, out emerges a familiar Great White Shark.

Jabberjaw: Ennn.. no respect! Not even from FoE...woo woo woo woo...

Echidna: WHAT?! WHERE'S MY POKé...

[Suddenly a strange castle appears and falls on Echidna, don't worry, folks, I Toonerised everyone, so no one really dies here... ]

Ryle: Oh, my God! It's Castle Fangerstein.

Dr. Fangerstein [looking like Peter Davison [Doctor #5] steps out]

Dr. F [speaking in Boris Karloff voice]: Edgar, this doesn't look like San Fernando...

Edgar [Lurchesque wolf-being butler] [speaks with ultrasmooth voice]: No, Doctor, I'm afraid the Castle's malfunctioning again.

Out comes Carolina [Mihoshi type] in a hot bikini.

Carolina [running out into the ocean]: BEACH PARTY!!!

Happosai appears....

[Happosai] Beware you all, the great ninja, Happosai shall make you feel his wrath!

[Ryle (sweating Manga-style)] Uh, Purity, we're doomed...

[Purity] Whaddya mean we're doomed? We're FoE! Nothing frightens us.. [looking suspiciously at Happosai]....

Note: Happosai is from Ranma 1/2, for those who've seen the series, you know what's gonna happen next...

[P] Okay, maybe this old guy creeps me out just a bit..

[H (eyes transfixed on Purity)] Pur..i...ty...

Without warning he pounces with a blur, stunning Purity only for a moment. Regaining her composure..Purity then screams in horror as her clothes bag is open...

[P] YOU PERVERTED OLD @#$! [Producing a mallet, Purity enragingly chases Happosai. Happosai is holding a bra and panties, waving them in the air proudly.. attracting Mechachu's interest] GIVE ME BACK MY UNDERWEAR, YOU SICK LITTLE PUDHBALL!!

[H (jumping proudly)] Aha, I've got Ms. Purity's brazier, Ms. Purity's brazier! [Suddenly without warning, a mysterious foot lands flat on Happosai..]

[Ranma (male form)]: So here you are [taking Purity's underwear from him]. I shoulda know, ya old freak! We can't leave you alone for one minute on this US Beach without you causing....

Purity slams her mallet directly into Ranma.

[P] Oho! So NOW I SEE..[grabbing her unmentionables from Ranma]...I should have known you were behind this Mr. Saotome!

[Ranma (emerging from the mallet)] LISSEN YOU! I WAS TRYING...

[P] Yeah, we know what you were trying.. (angrily she throws cold water at Ranma)

[Ranma (female)] Whaddya do that for? Okay, I'm pissed...

The next thing anyone knows is that Purity and Ranma engage in a scene that'd put all the Tekkens, Mortal Kombats and Street Fighters to shame...suddenly Echidna furiously emerges from the water...

[Ech] WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING?!? WHERE IS MY PIRANHA POKéMON?!?

[Ryle (confused)] Piranha?! I thought you wanted a shark Pok---

Without warning, bullets start raining down on the unsuspecting FoE and HF. Everyone scatters as a familiar figure is flying about on her hovercycle shooting her laser machine gun.

[Ryle] Hokey Smokes! It's BENTEN!!!

[Benten (from Urusei Yatsura)] So, you thought you'd have a beach party without me I'll show you!

Benten merciliess continues her assault upon the beach which goes on for about 5 minutes when another voice speaks..

[Mysterious voice]: benten, you know better...

[Benten (halting her assault; nervous)]: Huh..what are you doing here?

Echidna notices a beautiful snow princess sitting elegant next to him above the water. It's Fanger's cousin from UY, Oyuki...

[Oyuki (sipping some Coke)]: now then, we should all forget our differences and have a wonderful day. (then stares at Echidna) will you not?

We'll cut to the chase here: Echidna starts cussing out Oyuki, which is bad. Everyone [FoE and HF] runs for cover while Oyuki--although expressionless towards Echidna--causes the temperature around her to decrease rapidly...

[Oyuki] you know, mr. chidna, those abrasive name do not hurt me in the least.

Without warning, her eyes flash an intense icy blue, blinding everyone. Afterwards, we see Echidna, Jabberjaw, Ry, Mr. Manunu, Happosai and Benten all encased in ice within a .35-mile radius.

[Red Guy] oh, my..SEEMS LIKE SOME IDIOT PISSED OFF OYUKI..and now they're having to.. chill out..a heh, heh..so WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO ECH AND RY? oooh, I simply don't know...

Red Guy then notices a mob led by Ryle and Purity coming after him.

[Ryle] GET THE RED GUY!

[Purity] YEAH! HE'S RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THIS!!!

Thus both FoE and HF members go on a Red Guy-Rampage while RG runs for his little life.

[RG] oh...joy...I'm sooo popular...EVEN MORE POPULAR THAN SUPER COW!! It's my alluring red BUTT, you know...

Mom and Dad are viewing this scene.

[Mom] Look, Dad, FoE and HF are chasing some pantless Red Guy down the beach..

[Dad] Yes, Momma, haven't seen this much excitement since we gave that Echidna fellow some of your explosive potatoes at the picnic last year..

Both are silent for one moment, then both break out in hysterical laughter.